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Winning The Pig Cup With The Help Of Some Bacon T-Shirts

By Simon Bendis


If you happen to be from a rural area, then you are probably familiar with a habit that small towns have of throwing festivals once a year. These festivals usually encompass all of the downtown area and are a pretty big deal. All of these festivals are themed toward something that holds a big significance for the area. Are there tons of cotton farmers in the area? Well, you'll probably be attending a Cotton Festival sometime that year. Our town has Pig Fest, because of all of the pig farms and the pork processing plant here in town. There is always a big cook-off with prizes awarded to the best, and I plan on winning this year. My entry name? Bacon on Bacon Crime. I even have bacon t-shirts to give away.

People have traveled from far out-of-state, just to enjoy our Pig Festival. Some world-class food is prepared for our cooking contest, and available for samples. Everyone who enters is given space for a booth where they serve food to judges and samples to passers-by. Usually, everyone even makes some kind or pig, pork, or bacon t-shirts to promote their entry dish. It really is a fun and exciting way to celebrate the industry that has made our town thrive.

The competition, in general, gets pretty intense some years. Since it is a relatively small town, there are many people who enter year after year. Three local restaurant owners compete with some really excellent pulled-pork BBQ, and have all won several times apiece. There are far more unaffiliated people, though, who come up with unique dishes for the contest. These people compete year after year, and even have groups of local residents who have styled themselves as fans of certain amateur chefs. They even go so far as to wear the pork or bacon t-shirts that were given out by their cook of choice from the previous years.

My bacon t-shirts this year feature an awesome full-color image of my recipe, with the name of the sandwich at top: "Bacon on Bacon Crime." I plan on weaving a three lattices of bacon together to create large sheet of bacon, and then put those sheets in the smoker for 7 hours. I will then layer sharp cheddar cheese between the layers and then roll it all up tightly into an amazing bacon log. Slices from this bacon log will then be used to create a massive bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwich that will inevitably cause vegans to cry themselves to sleep. I have no doubt that I have a chance at victory this year.

All of my entry dishes in previous years have been powered by bacon, and many of the contest fans have begun calling me "The Bacon King". I can't think of a more awesome title, and I'm hoping that this year will solidify my rule in the hearts and minds of my loyal subjects. I had 200 bacon t-shirts made featuring my monster "Bacon on Bacon Crime" sandwich, and I want to see all of them given away. I may be getting a bit haughty here, but I can already see the Pig Cup trophy sitting on my mantle. I am the Bacon King...hear me roar.




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